Real Truths: The Cory Monteith Legacy

Whether you were a Glee fan or not the news that Cory Monteith had passed away came as a huge shock. Cory was known as the handsome jock on the hit TV show and as an equally handsome and considerate guy outside of the show. You try to find one bad thing about Cory and I promise you will struggle, it seems Cory was someone who wanted to give back in any way he could. 

Supporting charities close to his heart, to taking off and helping children who's dream it was to meet him Cory would do what he could - as soon as he could to help them. The Glee stars all gave hope to those who felt different, who believed they would get nowhere in life and those who really felt invisible. Cory himself shared his story freely with the media giving further hope and inspiration to those who believed they had no way out and no way of achieving their dreams. 

Cory was 31 years old when he passed. Since hearing the news I have felt grief so hard, I can only imagine what Lea Michele and Cory's family are feeling. I know it's easy to say you can only imagine how they are feeling, but in my case I really do know how they are feeling. 

My big brother Terry was a huge 15 years older than me. He doted on me and I doted on him, he was my rock, my confidant and my ray of light especially when things seemed difficult. I won't go into my whole upbringing but to glaze over it, I didn't have a typical upbringing. 

Terry was the one person I could rely on. Even though there was a huge age-gap he never spoke down to me and really treated me with so much respect and love. To me he was a big bear, huge in stature and so strong but when you got to know him he was full of love and compassion. Looking into his eyes at times was as though he had the weight of the world all locked away. 

Over the years he would go on his trips. He loved to walk and would just walk as far as he could at times calling from London (we stay in Scotland) and when I was 14 he called from Ireland. He loved to take in culture, meet new people and try anything he could. I remember hearing about a time he was with a group of new agers. They were celebrating the solstice and had a huge fire, he decided to take part in jumping over the fire, his boots ultimately melted to his feet... ouch! 

He was fearless and when I was 14 I was having quite a hard time with life in general. Speaking to him from Birmingham and hearing him say 'just wait 2 more years until we can go on an adventure' gave me the hope I needed to get through. I knew I would see him shortly after as he was heading back home, I couldn't wait. 

A few days later I was coming back from school walking into my house to a strange atmosphere was unnerving, my dad told me that Terry was gone. He died. I didn't believe it, I really couldn't believe it. We eventually found out more but it took over a month until we got the full facts and his body could be released. He was found at Birmingham train station dead from a heroin overdose, his friend had injected it into him and it was simply too much. The worst part was passers by just thought he was sleeping and some kids had robbed him while he was laid their dead. 

I just couldn't believe that my Terry was a heroin addict, he never had any of the signs and he never had any of the typical markings from injecting such a terrible drug. Of course we realise he could have been doing so in his feet to hide those marks. 15 years on and hearing the news about Cory hit home and all of those emotions and the pain I felt all of those years ago hit me once again and I'm still trying to battle my grief as we speak. 

See Cory's personality and my brother's were quite similar. My brother died when he was 29 years old - the same age I am just now. It's easy for people to say that they have no sympathy because drug users have the choice - Take drugs or don't take drugs. It's never that simple though. There is always a story behind people's actions, demons that torment us all and urges we all do even if we don't want to. 

You have an itch, you scratch it, you want that bar of chocolate-surely one square won't hurt, one more drink for the road, that ugly thought about that girl with the new car, hot boyfriend, that lurid sex dream about the hot guy or girl when your partners next to you. These actions are not actions we all want to act on - the truth is many of us do. 

For those who have an addiction, whether it's legal or illegal drugs, coffee, sex, lying, putting the light on and off X amount of times, smoking, exercising, drinking Cola or even using Facebook it's easy enough to put on a smile and hide things from those close to you. Heavens if anyone found out we had a flaw especially in a society where anything less than perfect is considered abnormal. 

Remembering this when we look at people such as Cory, helps us to understand why he never got the help that was needed on time. It helps us realise why people like Cory and my brother Terry hid these things - they probably felt ashamed, angry that they couldn't kick it and guilty that they were still indulging. 

These actions are not what define them. You have to remember the good things rather than the bad and truth be told my brother and Cory done more good than bad. They fought their habits but the habits fought back. This can happen to you and it could happen to me. It can happen to anyone of any age. 

I just want to close this real truth post by saying if you have something that you are struggling with, be it an addiction, a bad thought that won't pass or you feel you're on a downward spiral PLEASE ask for help. See your local medical professional or speak to someone - anyone. Addiction hurts everyone - not only yourself. I would hate for anyone to feel the pain that I've felt and millions of others have felt over loosing someone through addiction, especially when it could have been avoided. 

Learn from Cory Monteith, take action before you leave it too late. Stay strong guys. I'm sending my love, hugs and positive thoughts to those who need it, including Lea Michele and the family of Cory Monteith. 



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