Pregnancy 2019 | HCG Updates

Each loss has hard, but we always have so much hope for the next time. Because surely no-one can continue to have this many losses without any real reason right? Well, that's our mindset each and every time, each loss crushes us so badly I think because we have so much hope.

I've had pregnancies where we've had the usual spotting, cramping and then they've done Beta HCG blood tests, I've had others where they've done it to check progression. I've had pregnancies where I've not contacted the NHS whatsoever purely out of fear - those pregnancies were the worst, I wouldn't even do more pregnancy tests out of fear of seeing the line fade or darker.

This time around we a positive mindset once again. With the med cycle, it gives us more hope. When I first found out I was pregnant I took a First Response Early test, now it's easy to forget about sensitivity levels when you see those two lines show up as positive. Then typically I'd wait a few days to see if there's an increase in the lines and sure enough, there usually is, then I have on occasion done a Clearblue Digital - those tests are the work of the devil! I swear it.

So I did that exact routine this time around. Nearly a week after getting my positive test on the FRER (First Response) I took the digital because nearly a weeks enough surely to show you that you're ahead? I was hoping it would show 2-3 weeks or 3+ given what I'd worked out in my head.

It didn't.

It said 1-2 weeks. (This means 3-4 weeks).

Panic set in. Did this mean my HCG has stopped rising, were we facing the same fate as before?

I called the doctors to ask for an HCG test. Then the fertility clinic to advise. They called me to say that my result was 105 which was either early pregnancy or, a failing pregnancy. They advised (as usual) that it's not so much about the number, it's more about the doubling time and asked us to return on Saturday for our second BETA.

Heading to that appointment was horrible, I was so anxiety-riddled it was ridiculous, my heart was thumping in my chest but I wanted to remain positive. I had said to the nurse, OK so we're needing this to be 210, but hey let's just go for 289! We can do this. She laughed of course which helped ease the nervousness.

I got the call three hours later to say, unfortunately, my HCG had barely risen let alone doubled. We were 105 on Thursday, Saturday we needed 210 - My result was 139. Yes, it had increased, slightly. But, not doubled.

And so we return tomorrow morning for our third BETA. Tomorrow we need 278! I want to remain positive - I want this baby to kick itself up the backside and pump out that HCG likes a good little fetus. I've been chugging OJ because I heard it helps progesterone, silly I know but I'm all for helping this along nicely and not for it to pan out the same way as it has before.

Average HCG levels are above for each week. I'm still on the lower end, but there is no right or wrong in pregnancy, as long as it continues to increase. We've had no pains, discomfort, cramping or spotting like before - I can't think of any reason that we should go through the same given the sheer amount of tests we've had done.

But tomorrow (Monday 28th January) we will know more, but today I'm still pregnant...