Seven Miscarriages in Two Years | Our Story

As bloggers and a couple we're good with sharing the most crucial parts of our lives in hope that it helps someone else, in the past, I've shared my own struggles with body issues, ulcerative colitis, acne, autoimmune conditions, being a mum and mental health. As a reader or someone who connects via the screen of a computer, it's easy to think that many bloggers, myself included are brave or extroverted when in fact it's quite opposite.

Most bloggers I know are going through many struggles. Most are introverted (hence the connection via blog or social media) have had or have mental health problems, most have an anxiety disorder and generally are less confident than it appears. I am one of those bloggers. But, I write in hope that I can help others. If that comes at an expense of pushing myself out of my anxieties then so be it.

While I can share a lot, it's always scary. While I 'do' share what most don't know if there is a lot more I don't share. More heartache and struggle - the reason I don't share is mostly for fear of accepting the hardships, fear of it hurting me or others seeing me as ''weak'' or defective. And that in its self is not good, it's the seed that lets depression and anxiety grow - it's this reason I am now sharing our story as much as it hurts like hell. Maybe it will help someone or, maybe someone can help us? Either way here goes.

Ready to go in for the life-changing reversal | BMI Birmingham | Connor worrying about me getting an operation

In July 2017 I had a sterilisation reversal. It was simplified as they only had to reconnect the tubes and the overall length of my tubes was fantastic. The consultant was one of the best and his success rates were high which is why we opted to get it done via Dr Pickles at the BMI in Nottingham. Fast forward to September and we were pregnant, however, a few days later miscarried super early. Putting it down to not long having the operation I was sad but OK, I was optimistic that if I could get pregnant that quick, our chances were high.

In October the same thing happened. Again I was sad but realised there must be an adjustment period. Connor and I researched the hell out of fertility optimisation and put it into practice. I started exercising, we both ate a healthy balanced diet, I started taking Agnus Castus and we aimed to reduce overall stress.

November came around and my menstrual cycle came and went OK and tests showed I ovulated as normal. We were optimistic, then I started bleeding out of the blue (unusual for me as I always have cramps prior) I was gutted as I thought that was it. However, we were given Clomid which I was due to start on day 3. Something told me to test as I didn't want to take Clomid and risk if there was something there - I knew it was silly, but I just felt I had to. After peeing on the stick, I burst into tears. Yup, there it was two lines! I was in fact pregnant. The bleeding must have been implantation bleeding. Connor and I were ecstatic. The pregnancy progressed, I bloated up (as I always do) my boobs were huge, I would flake out with exhaustion, my smell had kicked in and I had that nauseating feeling at the back of my throat.

We progressed into December, it was the furthest we had gotten too. We were gearing up for an early scan and we'd announced to the boys that they were going to be big brothers. I had a sharp pain. No bleeding, no cramps, just this sharp pain in my ovary area on the left. It went away and I went to the hospital just to get it checked out. Tests showed my cervix was closed, urine tests showed I was still pregnant, everything looked great but they took blood anyway and said I was to return in 48 hours for a duplicate blood test.

We had the first tests done on the Friday, I remember it well. The duplicate test was Sunday - Christmas Eve. That night the doctor called, he was annoyed and rushed. He said ''Your HCG has dropped and you will miscarry'' that's it. Shocked and trying to compose myself I said but I feel fine. He seemed annoyed and said test again in four weeks if it still shows positive then call us back. That's it.

Early on Christmas Day, we miscarried our baby. I was utterly broken.

Deciding to put it down to fluke (I had fallen at work on the Tuesday before the incident) we persevered thinking it can't happen again. No-one is that unlucky. At this point Dr Pickles from the BMI was assisting us distantly, he advised me to start baby aspirin (low dose aspirin) as blood clotting issues can increase miscarriage risk and it would do no harm to take even if it was all OK. He wrote to the consultants in the NHS here to beg them to do further tests as this was technically our third miscarriage.

January came and again we fell pregnant but miscarried early. Putting it down to hormones and the backlash of the miscarriages (even though many other ladies successfully get pregnant straight after with zero issues). I went through the next few months with no menstrual cycle or ovulation - we started the Agnus Castus again to balance the hormone irregularities, we started a keto diet and started working towards improving my kidney and liver function.

In May we fell pregnant again. This time I started spotting at 4.5 weeks but with bed rest and a heck ton of water it stopped, but this pregnancy felt more sensitive. Like every movement caused mild cramps, that even going to the bathroom was enough to risk this baby growing inside of me. Then at 6 weeks, I started bleeding again. We went to the hospital and were booked in the next day for our scan. Heading to the hospital we were nervous and terrified. In the scan, room expecting to see our baby and it's heartbeat we were told it was not viable and yet again to expect to miscarry over the next few days.

Once again I was broken. This was hard for us both, I beat myself up and felt like a huge failure.

Now I know many will say why continue to do this to ourselves? The thing is we were referred to in January to the recurring miscarriage clinic at the hospital but they continued to cancel EVERY appointment. We felt like surely they wouldn't keep cancelling and, if we fell pregnant we'd have our up and coming appointment there for them to do further testing and checks (which is what we had been promised). In May I told them I was pregnant and they did zilch! continued to cancel our appointments then admitted they were in the wrong and probably could have done more to attempt to save our baby. An official complaint was placed with them which is on-going.

We finally begged them to do testing prior to actually ever getting our appointment. They agreed. So far we've had the following tests:

✦ Hormone Panel - All normal but my LH and testosterone were ''slightly'' elevated.
✦ Ovulation Tests - Showing normal ovulation, tested on days 21, 24, 28 and 35.
✦ Internal Scans - My uterus and surrounding areas are all clear and normal.
✦ Internal Scans - Checking specifically for growths, endometriosis, and PCOS all clear.
✦ Liver Function Test - All within the normal range at the moment.
✦ Thyroid Panel - Zero issues.
✦ Blood Clotting Disorders - No thrombosis or blood clotting issues.
✦ Auto-Immune Conditions (Lupus, ANA, AMA, etc) - I am AMA-M2 positive. It's not a miscarriage risk though.
✦ Standard Blood Panels (WBC, RBC, etc) - All normal for both of us.
✦ Chromosome / Karytyping - Both normal.
✦ Sperm Sample Testing - Variable.
✦ Testicle Scan - Normal blood flow.
✦ MTHFR - I do have MTHFR C677T and Connor has MTHFR A1298C. We both manage with methylated versions of supplements and through diet.

In August, the due date from our Christmas miscarriage came around and it hit us like a brick. So many miscarriages but so many reminders for what could have been. Shortly after my back went out. I had ''popped out'' a facet joint (who the hell just pops out a joint). At the appointment I was giving a huge amount of prescriptions to deal with the pain and inflammation - the doctor said 'you're not pregnant are you' and stated the gels and meds can cause miscarriage. I adamantly told him absolutely not.

But the next day, that little voice told me I should absolutely just check. And, on the 5th September, there were those two little lines - the day before Connor's 30th birthday. I tested again the next day and there was the blazing test. Something we'd never had this early. All tests were kinda light for us until further into the pregnancy. So we spent his 30th not drinking. And me hobbling about in pain due to my back - I was not going to take any meds.

The pregnancy progressed amazingly, we were still taking baby aspirin and I was on Crinone progesterone gel, just to give the pregnancy a helping hand. I had all of the symptoms and I felt great. No spotting, no cramping, I could go about my day normally. We were sure this was it. Around 5.5 weeks I woke in the night from a sharp ovary stabby pain but it went away and I thought it was implantation. The next few days I noticed my boobs were less sore, I noticed I was peeing less - I put it down to worry from the last pregnancies. I hadn't booked in at the hospital with this pregnancy, we told no one I didn't even take more tests. I was so scared and living in fear so I blocked the pregnancy out of my mind for fear of being hurt.

At 6.5 weeks I started spotting. I was so upset I didn't tell Connor. The next day he went to work, I had to call into work sick. I was in incredible amounts of pain this time. On Friday 21st September we lost our sixth baby.

Our seventh loss came again in November. Again early but we were so frustrated because the hospital knew this was an issue and that early care was needed but getting in touch with the consultant was a nightmare and the nurses don't seem bothered or want to help until someone reaches twelve weeks because ''these things happen''.

We then went onto have an eleven-week ectopic in February 2019. I will cover that in a separate post.

We just cannot understand how someone can have seven miscarriages all between four and seven weeks? When pregnant I don't do anything or take anything bad - not even coffee! We listen to my body and make allowances to suit what it needs and Connor does all of the heavy stuff in the house.

We've covered many of our pregnancies and losses on the blog, but so much is missing as I didn't want to cover it at the time due to hurt. You can check those TTC posts out.

If you know of anyone with similar experiences or suggestions please let us know. Either comment, social media or even drop me an email: Sweetelysepr@gmail.com. At this point, we're both positive it will happen for us.